Rollin' Like Sisyphus

Things I’ve Learned In The Occupational Wasteland, Plus A Superbowl Pick

Posted in 2012 - A Year Of Lasts by Huckleberry on February 2, 2012

I don't understand how I have even less free time than I did when I had multiple jobs, but alas. Plus, being a labor bureau statistic is as awful as you'd imagine.


So, as of today it has been officially three weeks since I’ve lost my last job. On the bright side, I’ve completed a long, long list of projects that I’d been unable to complete for a couple of years, mostly around the house and with my truck. Also, I resurrected my old mountain bike, spent four days up in San Luis Obispo, and have sent more than 100 CVs, resumes and cover letters out. As a yard stick for the current economic climate, 100+ applications has so far netted me exactly two interviews, six “thanks, but no thanks” responses, and a whole lotta waiting. And we all know what Tom Petty has to say about that.
But, I’ve also had the time to do something extremely frivolous as well.
I watched the entire Back to the Future trilogy again, back to back to back, for the first time since I was a child.
And you know what?
There are two glaring problems with the whole shet-and-shebang.

Problem 1 - This DeLorean is not going 88 MPH.


There are not many narrative rules to the use of the flying time machine.
To successfully travel through time, it needs:
1. 1.21 Gigawatts of electricity
2. To be traveling at 88 MPH, no more, no less
So, at the end of Back to the Future II, the flying time machine is hovering around in a lightening storm, traveling at, maybe, five miles per hour. The DeLorean is struck by lightning and ends up in 1885, setting up the events of the third film.
Now, if the time machine no longer needed to hit 88 MPH due to some modification made in 2015, so be it. However, the entire plot of Back to the Future III is about finding a steampunk way to get the DeLorean up to 88 MPH so Alex P. Keaton and Professor Plum can again get Back to the Future.
The second problem, however, is far more problematic.
Throughout all three films, Professor Plum is universally consistent in his adamance that the space-time continuum not be altered in any, for anyone’s benefit, no ifs ands or buts.
Except the entire series of events that precipitates both sequels results from Professor Plum inexplicably eschewing this reasoning and manipulating events in the future for no other reason than to save Alex P. Keaton’s family 30 years hence.
Remember, every time that Alex P. Keaton wants to do something to help himself out, or to save the Professor’s life, Plum scolds him vociferously.
Yet, for no real reason at all, Professor Plum kidnaps not only Alex P. Keaton, but Elizabeth Shue/Whoever Played “Jennifer” Before Elizabeth Shue as well, and takes them to 2015 to keep their future children out of prison by having Alex P. Keaton imitate his son.
Instead of, you know, Professor Plum just telling Alex P. Keaton “Hey, in 30 years, your borderline retarded son is going to commit a crime that will destroy your family. Watch out for that.”
Thus, two needless sequels are born.
Yes, its time to get back to work.

SUPERBOWL PICK
AGAINST THE SPREAD:
NY +3 over NE
STRAIGHT UP: NE over NY

RESULTS SO FAR
CONFERENCE ROUND
AGAINST THE SPREAD:
0-2
STRAIGHT UP: 1-1
DIVISIONAL ROUND
AGAINST THE SPREAD: 1-3
STRAIGHT UP: 3-1
WILD CARD ROUND
AGAINST THE SPREAD:
4-0
STRAIGHT UP: 3-1

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