Rollin' Like Sisyphus

A Plan So Good, We’ll Force You To Love It – Operators Are Standing By!

Posted in Our Simple Affirmative Action President by Huckleberry on October 28, 2013
Simply look under the cap for the Health Care Promotional Code, then log on to www.healthcare.gov/promos to enter the code for super savings. Good luck!

Simply look under the cap for the Health Care Promotional Code, then log on to http://www.healthcare.gov/promos to enter the code for super savings. Good luck!

The year 2013 has been dominated by two overarching themes as it relates to Our Simple Affirmative Action President. On the one hand, you have a super-slick cutting edge spy apparatus culling every electronic means of correspondence executed by more than a billion people, cataloging and cross-referencing the resulting data, then storing it for some future use, all while users remain blithely unaware of its existence. On the other hand, you have the bungled implementation of a basic two-stage e-commerce website that only needed to handle a single commodity, and couldn’t manage even subpar performance amid relatively tepid consumer demand.
I don’t have enough breadcrumbs to square this circle and make it back home alive.
That being said, the story of how the development of a website so simple in mandate could unravel so spectacularly is an interesting read; doubly so when one considers that many liberal pundits did a touchdown dance after the O-Force secured re-election (with less votes than the first time!) in part with a super-slick cutting edge web apparatus that micro-targeted probable sympathetic voters to track their actions, interpret those actions in terms of political calculation, then nudge them to the polls as necessary. This was widely attributed as THE reason for Our Simple Affirmative Action President’s victory and the Stormin’ Mormon’s defeat.
A president who, one year ago, was in charge of a campaign that supposedly pioneered the development of the most sophisticated and effective outreach and turnout system the political world has ever known – forging new ground in every possible sphere, with little to no testing lest the secret get out – was also in charge of an administration that, with many more years and considerably more resources, couldn’t develop a significantly simpler application, an application for which there are literally thousands of existing models to turn to for guidance.
You bet.
In other news, people keep saying that Our Simple Affirmative Action President’s credibility is “crumbling”, that his influence is “all but gone”, that this time, THIS TIME, the goose must surely be cooked, but we all know it just won’t stick. The media, no matter how much they’re used and abused by this administration, are not going to let a black man take the fall for this. They’ll drag him across that finish line if it kills them.
Here’s hopin’ it does.

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2 Responses

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  1. Giraffe said, on October 29, 2013 at 08:53

    I was wondering about this website failure. I am thinking it is on purpose. It is designed to cause a subtle shift in thinking. From “Why the hell do I have to sign up?”, “No way”, etc. to “what a bunch of incompetent boobs.” It takes the edge off. Fewer people are talking about the cost, losing their plans, broken promises, the blatant illegality of it all.

    After a few months of laughing at the O-man administration you are reprogrammed to think that this is just what you have to do. After they get it fixed, of course.

    I think if it had worked we would have had refusal to cooperate on a massive scale. Still might.

    • Huckleberry said, on November 5, 2013 at 07:34

      I don’t think the O-Team is clever or competent enough to fake this right. It’s tough to make a web application this inept on purpose.
      I do think that they knew a couple of weeks before launch that it’d crash and burn, decided to launch anyway and blame it all on overwhelming demand.
      The real fun comes in early-mid 2014 when employers have to dump employees from their insurance. 9 million losing “crappy” insurance will soon be 100 million.
      That’s my prediction – one year from now, 100 million will have lost their insurance, both individual and employer-based.
      And only the GOP could fuck up the opportunity, push amnesty instead, and fail to take the Senate.


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