Rollin' Like Sisyphus

Prognosticating The Least Important Election Of Your Lifetime

Posted in Our Simple Affirmative Action President by Huckleberry on September 23, 2014

Wipeout.

Wipeout.


You know, except for all of the others.
But seriously, today we’re six weeks away from the midterm election, an election that even the media hype machine can’t seem to get it up to talk about, and while they’re correct that the end results don’t really matter, they’re worth taking a spin around just to see what we’re dealing with.
The big question is whether the GOP will win enough seats to take the Senate, control both houses of Congress, and ride out the next two years just as they have the past four – making a big show about standing for and against the things that don’t matter, crumpling like so many cheap suits regarding the things that do matter.
They need to win six for an outright majority free from the perturbance of Vice President-Sheriff Joe Biden, and while all of the general forecasts, polls and electoral mood point to an easy eight-plus seat pickup for the party of Weeping Traitors, at a race-by-race level there’s a 50/50 shot the GOP doesn’t even pick up the six needed to flip the chamber.
How can this possibly be so? The Democrats have absolutely trashed the place in the past eight years. They haven’t polled this bad in such a wide range of areas since the Carter administration.
Surely they’re done, right?
Well.
Turns out that as much as the electorate has given up on the Dems, they seem to be realizing that it’s not a binary thing. Choosing to not vote for a Dem doesn’t then mean voting for the GOP opponent – in an environment as sick as this one, with as little at stake as this one, it surprises me not at all that specific GOP candidates – in most cases hand-picked candidates selected by elephantine power brokers for their easy electability – are derided just as vociferously.
I say good, they deserve to suffer the fruits of their treason.
If the Blues still hold the Senate on November 5, if you hear a cackling on the wind coming from the west that could only be described as frenzied and hysterical, that’s just your ol’ pal Huckleberry enjoying himself some fine vintage schadenfreude. And if the GOP musters six to eight seats, I’ll probably still laugh because by all rights those idiots should pick up 12 in a walk.
But they won’t because they can’t stop shitting their bed.
Granted, it’s still six weeks out, and there’s a lot of movement still to be had in the polls. However, nothing in the race-by-race polls suggest a “GOP Wave” is in the offing, as undecideds have yet to break in either direction.
My early, half-assed prediction: GOP picks up 7 seats by a razor’s margin.

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3 Responses

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  1. El Borak said, on September 23, 2014 at 14:10

    I’m hoping the GOP wins the Senate by exactly one vote, not because they’ll do anything useful with the gavel, but because they can then shove all the procedural and rules changes the Dems passed down their throats, ensuring squeals of outrage and a virtual flood of hot, bitter tears on the capitol steps. Then again, they might just hamstring themselves by putting all that obsolete code back into production, ensuring that nothing gets done at all.

    Which is really the best of all possible worlds. The only thing worse than the GOP doing nothing is them agreeing with the Democrats to do something.

  2. Giraffe said, on September 24, 2014 at 11:44

    It will be the first time in a long time, probably in my life, that my state will be all dead elephant party. I’m most likely staying home, unless some important ballot initiative comes up.

    • El Borak said, on September 24, 2014 at 18:00

      I’m trying to figure out if voting against all the judges is worth the gas the drive into town.


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